Paradise Lost

25th November, went back to my quaint little hometown of Ipoh. Ahh, the sweet feeling of being home after a long stretch in the hectic city of Kuala Lumpur.

As my friend Aaron and I said as we beheld the town...

Ipoh, where the traffic is still smooth and clear....

Ipoh, where the food is good, clean, and comes at a good price....

Ipoh, where the hottest women come from....

Ipoh, where the birds still sing and the skies are purest blue....


I was home.


Sad to say, it was not to last. The elation that I felt when I reached home was soon squelched by a growing feeling in my gut that something was going to go wrong. The feeling started off as a small emotion growing at the back of my mind, so I didn't pay much attention to it.

There was an event which I was expected to attend during the week, and to be honest, I was not looking forward to it. It sort of, well, lacked importance.

Now, it was a formal event, and everyone was expected to be in formal attire, or at least in smart casual. It was to be in a hotel ballroom, with a buffet dinner and tables and seats. Now naturally, when there are tables and seats, there are limits to how many people can sit, and therefore a limit to how many people can actually attend the event. At the reception, I was asked to fill up a card (yeah, I was surprised too.) and pay a fee of RM 20. I was expecting to keep the card or something and use it as a ticket for entrance. No deal. They asked for the card and said it was to "be able to keep in touch with the newcomers".

Well alright then.

What really messed it up was when the introductions had already started and the buffet was open to crowd. I noticed that there was still people still coming in and out of the hall. Latecomers , I thought to myself. And so, when I had took some coffee mousse (really nice, by the way) it was nothing to think about. To be honest, I didn't have an appetite for the buffet as I didn't like standing in a line which consisted of about a hundred people all scrambling for food like it was the only meal they had that day.

And there I was enjoying my mousse and talking with my friends when some of the committee came up to us and asked us if we could split up and sit at different tables because nobody would. The people at the tables mentioned consisted of older folk, and I suppose I understand the feeling of not wanting to sit with people you are uncomfortable with, but what the heck man? No arrangements? And you dare to ask people whom have already got their seats, sat down with their food, to get up and split up and sit in different tables JUST LIKE THAT?

No friggin' deal, man.

I was so angry, I just put down my food and walked off. Manners prevented me from making a scene of myself, which I still say would have served them right. So I mingled around, talked to some people, and took a look around the place. Took some pics of the place, talked to some of the staff, and after cooling off a bit, went back in. Wasn't really thinking much at the time, but when I saw the way the events went, I was gripped by a strong feeling of revulsion. Yes, revulsion. As in the kind of feeling you get when watching a gory movie and all you want to see is the ending credits.

An Indian "kollam" which was put there for Deepavali.

The drama was lousy, the acting horrible, and the characters were so over-dramaticized that each and every one of them looked and felt like they were trying to be Romeo and Juliet in Happy Tree Friends. After the spectacle, I sat outside the hall trying to recompose myself when my friends came and joined me. By and by, we decided that a drink would be welcome and we asked the reception for the location of the bar.

And so the rest of the night passed relatively well, with us unanimously agreeing that the couple of hours spent talking, laughing and listening to the pleasing sounds of jazz was infinitely better than the fiasco in the Crystal Ballroom.(Heh.)

Me and Eric after the event.



Me and Aaron.

An afterthought. When I saw how things were done here, it gave me a twinge of pride in myself that I could have done so much better and, at the same time, a mixture of regret and pity for the people who spent their time and money, to say nothing of effort, and came up with this....event.

In truth, the whole organization was like an old rundown car, not unlike my own, rusted and creaking at the joints. The owner will try and repair the car to an extent, try to polish it up a little, and the like. The sad thing is, you guys don't need to change the oil or tune the engine once in a while, you guys need a friggin' overhaul. Damn.

The saddest thing is, I used to be with you. I used to do things with you. I laughed with you. I worked with you. I used to be proud of the fact that I was one of you. And yet, after I left, I realised exactly what was going on that made the situation it is today.

How can I sum it all up? A lack of exposure, lack of management, no sense of responsibility. I respect the fact that the management gave a lot of effort for this event, but if the work was put into place correctly, do all of you think that it would have gone the way it had? I for one do not think so.

Think on it.

This is the truth. You guys are immature. You can make some pretty bold claims on how you will "make history", but you can't even make it into the hearts and minds of your OWN people. Don't come to me with excuses when you had the resources, the time, and the manpower for the job. As my friend said, it would have made a phenomenal difference if even a small change like seating arrangements were made.

You guys could have done so much better. Sigh.

A trip back home has never been so disappointing.

Paraíso Perdido.

Two Sides of The Same Coin

Knowledge is power.

Or so it is said. But is it truly? Yes, knowing about things makes one more aware of his or her surroundings then they usually would be, knowing where to go and what to do at what time.

But is it really all as great as it's cracked up to be?

Knowing some of the things I do has certainly have helped me with the things I do in my life,
although I could say the opposite about some. Frankly speaking, some of the knowledge I possess have really helped me out, saving my bacon on more than one occasion.

What happens when you know more than you should? Or find out something you shouldn't?
Forgetting isn't as convenient as that, you know. Most people would keep mum, as the British say, or in Malaysian terms tutup mulut. Alas, more often than not, word spills out and suddenly everyone from your peers in college or colleagues in your workplace to your fishmonger in your local pasar malam is gossiping about the latest scandal about you.

Sometimes when a person has the chance to do something good to or for someone else, they find out something about the opposing party that will inevitably have an irreparable effect on the person that they want to help. In that kind of situation, what is the person to do? Tell the friend and risk breaking their spirit about the whole matter? Or do they sit tight and keep quiet and risk having the friend finding out on their own and then lying through their teeth about not knowing a thing about it? Descisions, descisions.

Personally, I think that the person deserves to know, depending on the type of situation, of course. If the person is expected to not be able to handle it, then if you go ahead and tell them, don't say I didn't warn you.

In any case, rushing is definitely not recommended. Trust me, it will most times result in misunderstanding. One must find a catalyst, or medium, to breach the subject to the person they want to tell it to. (That is, IF they want to divulge it.)

Well, for guys, they tend to take it head on, so for them, it probably doesn't matter how you approach them. (Although any misunderstandings are to be put straight immediately.)

For girls................sigh. Do try the gentler approach. Misunderstandings aplenty.

This post was not meant to offend anybody, so kindly do not take offence and just take it as it is.

Now if only i can find the right way to tell that person. Sigh.

A (Somewhat) Surprising Request

First: a question.

Has anybody ever came to you and asked you a question you never thought you'd encounter?

I'll bet some of you have this experience; then I'm sure you know the feeling.

Here's the story; a girl and I was chatting on msn, (rubbish talk as usual) when I complimented her on the dress she was wearing in her display picture. I told her that she was having the kind of expression of a person who is expecting something more in the reflection that she sees in the mirror. (Weird, yes. I know.)

Well what do you know. She went on and started asking me to teach her how to attract guys and I'm like if I teach you about attracting and chasing after guys then that means I'm gay isn't it? Weird.

Well, all I can do is provide insight and information into the male mind, advice aside, but that's about it.

I am honored that you have trust enough in me to share your feelings and thoughts on this guy that's captured your (rather tempestuous) heart. I sincerely hope that the guy you have feelings for will notice and reciprocate your actions toward him.

For the most part, I was (damn I feel old) rather surprised.

Best of luck to you.

New Semester

Finally.....new sem!! It's been too long, seriously. But I'm thankful for the time that I had to, shall we say, pursue my personal interests.

This semester I'm going to have about twice the headache I had over the last few sems, I suppose. Just looking at the subjects and the contents are enough to make us all sigh. And there's STILL maths subjects! Darn.

Being not a study person, I suppose I'm gonna have to put in extra work for this sem. Plus i gotta balance my time between work and play. Sheesh.

Got three new classmates this time, two Chinese and one Indian. Same case as last time, one and only female in the whole class. Nice people in general, but kinda hard to communicate with them since I'm not very good in speaking Mandarin.(Gotta learn, I guess.)

Well, that's it for this post. Will post sometime when something comes up.

I just hope I can cope with it this time.

A Little Something to Think About

It's been a awhile since my last post......been quite busy these days. It's so tiring these days......hope to get my mind off things for a while.

Been chatting with a friend of mine from college today, discussion went on from music to games to useless stuff like wasting time talking on how to waste time (useless isn't it?) until the topic of "romantic relationships" came up.

Hard topic to talk about, normally, except when speaking from personal experience. She told me that due to an incident 3 years ago, she didn't believe in "love" anymore. Well, what could I say? It's all your fault? Obviously not. More like "There, there my dear, don't cry" kinda thing.

As I read on, one thing became apparent to me; people are very funny. She said to me, " A relationship is not a relationship when one in a couple have no feelings towards the other."
I said to her, "Well then, are you telling me to give up?"

If, and only if, someone starts to have feelings towards another party can something come out of it, no? Yes, the feeling should be mutual, and yet, some people think if it wasn't meant to be, it wasn't meant to be. So might as well give up.

Everybody has flaws. Everybody will be rejected in their relationships one way or another, at one time or another. And then what becomes of that? Just because one relationship ended in a bad way means no more relationships? Well, then you could say that just because a meal tasted bad then you aren't gonna eat anymore? Or because the air smells bad then you aren't gonna breathe anymore?

Get up, I say. Get up and keep moving forward. The past is history, the future is a mystery. Today is a gift, thats why it's called the present.(Thanks Dave.)

Keep moving forward. Experience life in all it's abundance. Give yourself a chance to see the beauty of the things God has given you. Live. Even if you fall down, always know that someone somewhere will pick you up and help you move on. And if someone falls in front of you, help them to move on in their life. We are flawed, which is why we need each other. And through helping others and yourself, you will find yourself. That's what it means to be human.

Think about it.

A Nice Guy

Met an local Indian student today by the name of Mallis.

When I saw him, he looked tired, like he'd been through a long day. Well, it WAS late in the evening, so he was probably going home after a day of work or study.

Still, he was quite talkative and we had a nice conversation throughout the train ride.

Now, from my experience, it is bloody hard to get (or make) good conversation when one's tired.
I've seen people who've turned away when i spoke to them, people who just look at you and sigh, as though you're the cause of their problems, bla bla bla.

What struck me was although he looked really tired, we still had a nice chat about things. The easy way in which he said stuff had me going "This guy's a nice guy", know what I mean?

In my case, I don't meet many people like that, or sometimes not at all.

I think we all should take a leaf out of this guy's book and at least try to be a nicer person to the world in general.

My new friend Mallis, nice to have met you.

Making a Difference in The World

Is it so really so hard to make a difference? Just today i went to Times Square and KLCC. Everywhere i went i saw people doing what is expected of them; window shopping.

Typical, right?

Well, yeah.

There are four kinds of people in this world; that is, people who:

1) Has Money and Time
2) Has no Time, but has Money
3) Has Time, but has no Money
4) Has no Money and no Time

Thing that bothers me the most is the comments I hear everywhere;

"Wish I could buy this (insert item here)"
"Would you buy this for me please?"
"I can't afford this on my salary. Gotta save for it."

Sigh. Seems like most people belong to the 3rd and 4th category.(No offence.)

Why do they not search for a way to get out of the loop that they keep circling in?

God knows.

How can a man change a world?

If he decides to.

First Ever

Hey everyone....this is my first blog ever....hope for your support and do post comments k? I'll update randomly about things that happen, hope you'll like them! Be seeing you then....